Prelude To War
by Knuckles
Summary: This is the story of a war fought between the Evil Tediz Bastards and the Squirrels.


Prelude To War  
by Knuckles  
I dont own any characters places or weapons in this fanfic....blah blah blah. Im so damn sick of writing this crap. Anyway...  
"Ok guys. Atten...tion! Right! Get ourselves a weapon, and take out those evil Tediz bastards!," the general said. The 12 army squirrels formed a line. Conker and Berri were two of them. Conker had a shotgun. Berri was toting 2 machine guns, one in each hand. One of them ran up and took control of the giant machine gun. Two of them ran upstairs, got sniper rifles, laid down, and aimed into the field searching for Tediz. The rest ran downstairs. They armed themselves with Assault Rifles, Cougar Magnums, and two machine guns. They positioned themselves around the base so that 2 Squirrels covered each entrance.  
"All right men! Let's go get those damn tediz!," Conker said. The squirrels nodded. They ran towards the door. However, just as they got to it, it closed in front of them. "What the hell?," one of the squirrels said. The alarm went off, and red lights began to flash. "Warning Warning unauthorized movement in the lower chambers. "Like, let's go kick some ass soldiers," Berri said. She and Conker ran towards the door leading to the lower part of the base. They were at the corner that would lead to the lower sections. "Ok guys. Try to stay quiet," Conker said. They turned the corner and saw nothing. The power must have been cut to the lower level because there was very little light. They looked around, as they walked forward. Conker and Berri led the way. They continued walking.  
Thud! Something landed behind them. Before they could even turn the Tediz had torn into the squirrel. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH," the squirrel yelled in pain as he was sliced and diced by the Tediz. The rest of the squirrels turned around and raised their guns. Before they could fire the Tediz got a slash at another squirrel. The Tediz growled as the blade slices through the squirrels skin. Everybody fired at it. It didnt have a head anymore. It's lifeless body fell to the ground, as did the wounded squirrel and the dead squirrel. The wounded squirrel groaned in agony.  
"What should we do with him? He's only gonna slow us down," Conker said. "I can make it! I can make it!," the squirrel said. One of the other squirrels shot him in the head with his assault rifle. "Dead weight. No reason to bring him, "he said. "Ugh...men," Berri said. They resumed walking.  
Conker saw something moving in front of them. He took out his binoculars and took a closer look. He saw 7 Tediz destroying equipment. "Shit! Let's go soldiers!!," he said. They ran towards the Tediz. Only three of them were left. There was a big place to drop a canister in front of them. They each got behind it and used it for cover. They opened fire on the Tediz. 3 of them were killed. The rest got cover and returned fire. The Tediz called in reinforcements and 25 more Tediz came to their aid.  
"Shit! Theres almost 30 of them!!," the army squirrel said. "Got bazooka?," Conker asked. The squirrel nodded and pulled it out. He passed it to Conker. "Berri would you lay down some cover fire please?," He asked. "Anything for you Conker," she responded as she fired at the Tediz. None of the Tediz were hurt, but it did open a chance for Conker to use the bazooka. He did so. The wall behind the Tediz collapsed onto them. "Yes! We got 'em!," Conker said happily. Berri smiled. The last squirrel did too.  
Then Conker noticed something strange. There was a red dot on the squirrels head. "GET DOWN!," Conker yelled as he ducked. "What? Why?" the squirrel asked as Berri ducked down. A bullet flew at the squirrels head. It struck him in the head, and the body fell to the ground. "Shit!," Conker yelled. "There's like snipers," Berri said. "Yeah," Conker responded. They ducked behind the place where you drop canisters. Fire from the snipers didnt even slow down. Conker got on the radio. "Help us! We are locked down in the basement! We need backup now!!," He yelled into it. But no one responded.  
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. The wall to the side of them was blown in by a tank. "Get your asses outta there," the general yelled at them as his soldiers killed the snipers. Conker and Berri ran towards the general. The tank stayed there. The squirrel inside the tank activated the self destruct. He climbed out and ran. "We have to get our asses outta here!" the general yelled. All them dove onto the boat. The door closed behind them. The boat took off. Conker looked at the 5 other people in the boat. "Whew we made it out," he said. "Like, duh Conker honey," Berri said. "We sure is lucky bastards," The general said. "Oh shit! General I've got something on radar," the boat driver said. "Its a submarine. OH HELL!!! Brace for impact!," He yelled as he ducked down. The torpedo slammed into the boat. The boat rocked violently. "Where is the nearest land?!?!!" the general asked. "About 2 miles away. Should i set a course?," The boat driver responded. "Hell yeah," answered the general. The boat pilot set the course. 10 minutes later they were on a beach. "Thank god we're on land," cheered a squirrel as he stood up. Machine gun fire came from nowhere. The bullets struck the squirrel hard. The squirrel's body fell backwards into the water. "Damn snipers!!," Conker yelled. Machine gun fire rained on them. The general looked around for somewhere to hide. He spotted a trench. "This way," he yelled as he ran for it. Conker and Berri followed. "We need help," The general said into the radio as he ran. "There's trucks under the Tediz base. Get your asses over there," someone responded.  
"We're locked down. Murder holes up there. We gotta clear em out to get to the truck!," Conker said. "Like grab your weapons and aim. I'll distract them," Berri said. "But honey...," Conker began. "Like, just trust me ok?" Berri said cutting him off. "All right Berri I trust you," Conker responded. The general and Conker pulled out their machines, loaded, and aimed at the holes. Conker looked at Berri and nodded. Berri stood up and took off her bra. The Tediz stopped firing for a second. Conker and the general opened fire on the Tediz. Conker and the general stopped firing. Nothing happened. Berri put her bra back on. "Like I told you I'd distract them honey," Berri said. "Uhhhh...yeah....good job," Conker responded. "Lets get our asses up that beach!!," The general yelled. They all ran towards the trucks. They jumped in and the truck took off.  
"We defeated the Tediz...finally," The general said. "Yeah," Conker and Berri said at the same time. They all sat in the truck silently. 'I need a beer' Conker thought to himself. 'Whoah that was something else' Berri thought. 'That couldn't have been all the Tediz. Reports said there were hundreds.' The General thought to himself.  
THE END  
if people like it ill write a sequel in which it is all out war between the Tediz and the Army Squirrel's. But until then hope you liked this one, you can look forward to a more action packed sequel.  
  



End file.
